Surf Break

We have been surfing weekly since the start of this year. I love it so much but sometimes we need to learn to control our thirst for this passion. Last January 9, Adam surfed a new spot with Bean's godfather, Alvin. I didn't get to try it because I know I need more skill to go out on waves that size. But the boys let me have my share of fun that afternoon with knee to waist high waves.

Last weekend, we went on a three-day surf trip. I even joined a mini competition on the spot. I honestly didn't want to because Adam was not there, I was taking care of our girl in between heats and I know I have been used to using my trusty old 8'0" and it was a long-board competition using boards 8'6" and above. I honestly suck using a 9'0". And after every round I was secretly wishing to fail. But I made third place, surprisingly! I know I am not the "contest" type of person but I had fun. :) The sets were waist to shoulder high during that morning and even the next day. I usually prefer waves around shoulder to head high....and on the third day..... it was head high to overhead (based on my height).

I was wearing a watch that time because I wanted to surf only for an hour. After two straight nights of drinking and two straight days of surfing...I was exhausted. Kei and Tanya were there to take care of Bean that's why we have been having so much water time....and before paddling out to surf those overhead waves I thought to myself...."why did it have to be this big when my body is so tired!"

It took me 30 minutes to get to the lineup. This included me calling Adam because I panicked. I wanted him to paddle out beside me. After a grueling 30 minutes I reached the lineup with tears on my eyes. Deep inside I wanted to redeem myself....so as the sets came in I put all that I learned into use. I chose a sizable wave smartly. I paddled so hard, took off early, angled to the right and then sharply turned to the left...and I used everything in me to trim that wave properly. And I did it. I was so happy that people were commending me for that "ride of the day" I feel like the thirty minute paddle out with tears didn't matter anymore.

Adam and Joan had a great time, too! I feel so proud of Adam for achieving his goals on the timeline he has set for himself. I am also proud of Joan for coming out stronger every session. I am also happy that JP is already enjoying his board. We have only been surfing together for 7 months...but this lot feels like family to me.

After this trip we all decided to rest for a while. I injured my wrist this last session. Honestly, I have been feeling the pain on my left wrist since October last year....but I paid it no mind. I did more yoga and surfed more thinking that I would become stronger....but because I never took a break from my practice and from catching waves....my wrist gave in. I can't even use it for anything. Even Joan has an injury to nurse. I know we are taking a break from it all...but in the back of my head I am thinking of the next surf trip....and how to pop up with one hand! Yes, it's that addicting.

2015: Be You

Happy New Year!

Indeed, we started 2015 the way we wanted. As soon as the first of January we left early to go surf. Though this post may contain photos during our last trip...I am on to something else. Nope, I am not writing my resolutions because I have none. Well, I used to...when I was younger. Looking back, my old self would always focus on the physical and material aspects of life. For example, I would make a list of the things I would wish to acquire during the year, or commit to another kind of diet or workout routine. Which right now seem to matter little to me. Adam was right all along...people keep on finding or looking for things to have and things to change because they are not yet truly happy. 

Of course I still do have some material things that I want...but it doesn't really matter unless they are things that are needed. I still am trying to progress and move on to new exercise routines and eating plans....but the difference is...I am doing it to be healthy and strong and not to lose weight or try to look like reed-thin models. 

I can say that 2014 is a very significant year for me.

The past year made me strong physically, mentally, and emotionally (a little bit). It taught me that hard work indeed pays off. It proved true that "nothing worth having comes easy." I wanted to be strong enough to progress with my surfing...so I made it a point to stick to my yoga practice each day that I am able to. I figured that I tire easily so I slowly added cardio workouts to my routine. I wanted to be smart in the water so I listened to those who had more experience than me.

Not only with surfing did I work hard. I also worked hard on being a good mother and a good wife. I started to accept the fact that there is no thing as perfection when it comes to parenting. That my daughter is still a kid and that I have to take it easy on her during the times she throws fits and acts crazy around people. I started to listen more to my husband instead of just listening to what my head told me. 

But I worked hardest to be a better version of myself last year. Through motherhood, marriage, new friendships, yoga, art and surfing I go to know myself. I became "me." Imagine, it took me 7 months to do a headstand, 9 months to officially catch my own waves and paddle a board a foot shorter than what I usually used, 14 years to battle and conquer an eating disorder and an obsession with exercise, 15 years to kick negative habits, and 30 years to finally love myself the way HE created me.

I have seriously considered editing this picture of me...maybe liquify that PMS belly and big thighs to make them disappear; take a few inches off of my waist and stretch my body for a little bit of height....but NO.

"I am proud of the woman I am today

 because I went through one hell of a time becoming her."

I am not ashamed to say that it has been one of my superficial goals to be able to surf in a bikini. I guess those "surf girl" pins on Pinterest made me do so...or maybe it's just what I really want. Either way, I always had an excuse....I am bloated because of PMS, the top might come off during a wipe out, I forgot to wax/shave my armpits, ate too much last night....it never ends. The day I turned 30 it sank in  my head that I am not getting any younger...and so I went ahead and did it. I surfed wearing what I always wanted to wear. Guess what? I felt normal. It wasn't so bad. The best part is, NOBODY cared. Also, it was so easy to move in the water! I always feared criticism....but I guess the worst critic would always be me. 

I also have let go of achieving the perfect "body" by media's standards. So what if I have super big thighs? They are the ones responsible for bearing my weight and getting me to places. I have this mommy pouch that appears before I get my period or when I let go with my eating a little bit....but that little bloated pouch is from carrying one of the best gifts in the world! My skin went from fair to really dark...but I don't care because that's the price I have to pay for the happiness I now feel. I used to complain to Adam that my arms got bigger....and he told me to pay it no mind because it is the result of my yoga practice and learning and improving my paddle.

Also, I accepted the fact that it would take me a while to catch up to Adam's surfing. Physically, I am weaker...and emotionally I am easily swayed by my emotions. Any sign of stress or negativity reflects the way a surf session would go.

So this 2015 I have no resolutions. I would just continue to be myself and work hard for the things that I want to happen. I would just be.....truly happy. I hope everyone would be, too! Happy 2015!