32/52: Happy Birthday, Kid!

32/52

             "A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014." 

Bean has been referring to herself as a "kid" not a baby. Hence, Happy Birthday, kid! She turned three last August 9 and we had a mini celebration with family and friends the day after. I usually bake 60 cupcakes at this special time of the year; but because I get exhausted at this stage of motherhood (yep, meaning a mom to a highly energetic and talkative three-year old) we opted to have them and the cake ordered and customized. We have been asking her for the past month about what theme she would like and she's been begging us for a "Peppa Pig" party. So it shall be.

Also, she asked me a week before, "Can you buy me a dress for my birthday? I want it with pink buttons!" We took her to the mall and she shopped for herself! She can put an outfit together and I am liking her sense of fashion. It's kind of old school and dainty in contrast to her love for cars and 'surf'. 

Adam and I were surprised that Bean was a big help during the party preparations, mostly with the decorations. I wasn't sure about letting her help because I thought she'd just make a mess...but to my surprise she's very organized and can take directions well. We are so very lucky!!!

Bean's first guest is Ziva,

such a cutie! :)

I never really knew how much my heart could love so much until you, Bean. Nobody expected me to be the mothering kind...but we proved them wrong, didn't we? Lol. I think this is what I was born to do. It feels so natural to me. Though I miss art, photography (even surfing)...being your mom will always top the list!

Hello, pretty Winter!

Most, if not all, people tell me that my skin has gotten so dark already.

At first I got sad about it but now I look at it as a measurement of how much

fun the ocean and the surf gives me.

I am having so much fun indeed!

Bean is so in love with her cake that up until now she asks to stare at it at meal times.

We can eat the cake; but not touch the piggies.

Our little artist.

Little kids that have my heart.

One of the highlights of her day was tita Joan's gift! A month ago I posted a video

on Instagram asking her what she wants for her birthday to which she replied,

"A pink surfboard and a Go Pro."

One thing that really touched me were the gifts she got. I am so thankful for the thoughtfulness of family and friends giving her things that she'd surely use and enjoy. My heart is overflowing with love for each and everyone one of you who made Bean's birthday the best day ever!

P.S. Before she slept that night she asked her daddy, "Daddy, can you dance with me? The party isn't finished yet because we didn't dance." Isn't she the sweetest?

31/52 and how i am feeling these days

                                           31/52

             "A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014." 

This afternoon we played with animal tattoos and her froggy hat. Bean is turning three in about a week and I am still not ready. She's not even turning into a teenager; yet here I am feeling a little bittersweet. The later half of her year as a two year old is so challenging! She throws fits like there is no tomorrow; at the same time, she can be the sweetest girl in the world giving us random kisses and telling us she loves us over and over again. 

Bean always bugs me about going to school on "school day" but when I tell her I won't be going she'd change her mind. I do want her to go to school but I know I'll miss her so very much. 

Life has changed; it definately has. And though it pains me, I know I have to let go of other things and people in order to make room for others who are worthy of my friendship...of me. I love life right now. We're going on surf trips with friends and they are becoming just like family so fast. I do miss parts of my old life like photography, reading books on quiet afternoons, even just talking with my husband without a toddler in the way... I just miss these things but there is no way they can make up for the happiness we have at present. Just the surf makes up the most of it!

I also do miss being complete. I have never been vocal about it but I miss my cousin AK so much. The hurt never went away and I don't wish it to. On afternoons when my daughter is asleep and Adam is at work I cry. Most times I scroll through her messages on my phone. Maybe this is the way it's supposed to be; maybe she needed to go to spark the changes in our lives. Maybe it's time to accept that even if I still can't and still refuse to.  I miss her infectious laughter, her big heart. I miss how she is the only one who does FaceTime with me, who asks me about the things I'm doing. Hey,  Trin...how are you up there? I wish you could see me, Bean and Adam. I imagine you being so proud of your God daughter. I want you to know that I really miss you, but I'm not mad that you're gone. I am thankful because you still are my source of strength in the midst of struggles. I love you.

30/52 and the surfing journey continues

30/52

"A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014." 

Not because I'm her mother; but, I really think this little lady is growing up beautifully. Not just physically. She is too sweet for words. Sometimes she can throw a fit, but that doesn't happen a lot. What we are so lucky about is how much she grew to love the ocean. The only trouble we get into is asking her to leave the beach. I am so proud of how she is turning out to be...well-spoken, well-mannered, and fun to be with. Our friends are becoming her family and we couldn't ask for anything more.

I found it so adorable when she approached the receptionist of the resort, raised her hand and said, "Excuse me can I borrow a bucket and a 'tabo' please. I need to take a bath," in her British accent. oh dear Bean, I love you more than anything else (your daddy and surfing too).

  

Now I will proceed to write about our long surf weekend. We left Friday afternoon so that we can be at San Antonio in Zambales for Adam's first ever competition.  We stayed that first night at Megan's Resort. The room was clean and spacious; the price was a bit higher than I expected...but that's okay as they said it's the most decent place in the area. We slept early as Adam needed to be at "Magic Left" by 7 in the morning. Me, my cousin, and Bean spent the whole morning watching heats and playing in the water. Too bad he didn't make it  to the semis, but that's okay. We have our whole life ahead of us to surf! Adam joined us for lunch...then we proceeded to watch the competition end. He even had a little more time to surf. That night we waited for JP and Joan to arrive. We had a few laughs here and there; joined the PSA party for a few drinks and called it a night. The next morning we packed our bags and proceeded to San Narciso where we feel most at home.

Ah! I am very thankful for my cousin who helps me manage Bean

on surf trips like these! Thanks Ten!

Most people these days are shocked at how dark-skinned I already am; but 

this kind of life makes me the happiest. 

I don't care what people think anymore.

Magic Left

Watching Adam surf makes my heart beat faster. I love you more and more

everyday. I am so grateful for all that you've brought into my life.

"This is the best day ever, mommy. I love the water; this is awesome! 

How about we go to the beach on my birthday?"

"Look. I made this castle for daddy. This will make him so happy!" 

We do not really need to entertain her so much; she builds her own

little world these days.

We spent the remaining days surfing and focusing on improvement while having fun. It was indeed fun. Though the last morning the swell was too big for us only Adam surfed.

Goofy foot, please go left.

Joan, I think is the bravest of us all. Haha.

JP, please buy a longer board. :)

I temporarily use Adam's board because I need to develop my paddle power to 

use mine.

Ten bracing herself for the drop.

And here are some screen captures from the GoPro that afternoon that the waves were small and friendly:

We are starting to feel like family; or we already are one. Every trip is fun and I think it helps us grow as individuals and as a group. While watching cartoons with Bean, I found this song very fitting for us:

Adventure Time Ending Theme Come along with me To a town beside the sea We can wander through the forest And do so as we please. Come along with me To a cliff under a tree. Where we'll gaze upon on the water As an everlasting dream All of my affections I'll give them all to you Maybe by next summer We won't have changed our tune 'Cause we'll want to be In this town beside the sea Making up new numbers And living so merrily All of my affections Give them all to you I'll be here for you always And always be for you Come along with me To a town beside the sea We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Living so merrily

29/52

             29/52

                 "A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014." 

Well, I have been quite busy being a mother lately...and on a mission to get stronger...so I haven't really got the time to pick up my camera. These pictures were taken with my iPad. Lately,  Bean says the funniest things (with her new Brit accent):

"Daddy, what do you do in your office all day?"

"Good morning, mommy. You have to say good morning to me too or you'd be rude."

"Can I have some milk? It's important."

"Actually, I think I have a problem."

"Please be happy mommy. I love you, is your heart happy now?"

"Can we go to Bali now?"

"Bali is my home. It's my favorite."

"I need to pack my stuff for the beach. I need my swimsuit, sun cream, shovels, and leash." (She'd say this every week).

After buying her toy binoculars...she keeps on saying she's a world explorer.

Oh the dreams we have for you little girl...but for now please don't grow up so fast.