22 & 23/52 and something about disappointment and changes

22/52

"A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014."

These are photos of Bean I snapped one weekend ago while me and Adam were busy cleaning up the room. She just sat on one corner, picked up a book and looked through the pages. I say "looked through the pages" because I know that we are still in the process of teaching her to read. She knows all the letters and their sounds, she can write some of them too. She talks like a 10 year old though, which surprises me, really. This particular afternoon I asked her what she's doing to which she replied, "Just nothing, mommy. So that I will not disturb you."

23/52

These were taken this weekend after she cried non-stop on the shore after being *ehem* bullied by a boy introducing her to the "real world". It's not really hard to make her happy, the beach is one thing that gives her joy. And we can't be thankful enough because it makes it easier to fulfill that dream of becoming better at surfing. It was also nice that she felt at home instantly with her new friends: tita ninang, tita friend, and tito "what's his name?"

something about disappointment and changes

We were excited for this trip. Because the last real surf we had was in Bali. Two months without surfing really did me bad, and I didn't know until this weekend. With a new board, it also made things harder for me (because Adam always seems to do it easily).

We brought with us some friends: Kirsten (my cousin), John Paul (Adam's friend), and Joan (my friend). It was fun, for a change, because it was usually just us three. I am grateful for the extra hands; I really am.

I tried really hard not to let it get to me, but it did. Not being able to properly paddle my shorter board, and always either missing the wave or nose diving the first day brought my confidence down to zero. That was it for me. Honestly, I was lost and I wanted somebody to tell me what's wrong, and what I should do. But I realized, nobody really learns the easy way. I have come to realize that in order to be good I should be able to deal with failure first. I have always used a 9'0" or an 8'6"...and adjusting to a 7'5" isn't really a smooth transition for me. I have decided to just accept that this situation already happened and that I will move on. The waves will keep coming, and I will just keep on paddling. I will just have to try harder and avoid hesitating next time.

Figuring out my balance on my new board.

I am glad that our friends had a great time in the water despite the way I felt about my performance. I feel good about sharing the stoke. Sorry, JP...there aren't any pictures of you, but thank you for taking some of the pictures!

Joan

Kirsten

On Sunday morning, the waves were big, and we got to see the big kids play! Oh how beautiful Tamara Benitez and Camille Pilar surfed. One day. One day maybe I will be able to be just like them. Patience.